hurts.
22 January 2007 8:21:00 pm
insensitive? but it hurt me too. i hate myself now.happy b'dae cheryl loh n david sng ((:
went shopping wit cheak after church last sundae,one wk ago. spent more again. my wallet really has a BIG big hole now ):
work work work. i'm dying soon!! early mornings just ain't my kind. but i'm still an early bird. body clock wakes me up at 8-ish, 9am on normal days. Wednesday was a really special day. took half day leave and headed down to school,YES SCHOOL ! ((: i so miss touch. haven't held the rugby ball for ubber long. met ryan,char,ade,jeremy at lot1 1st. then we cabbed to school. juniors were having their trials to recruit the j1s so we had a short game. kai yin,huiyi,kaixin,alana,char,ade n me. sweet. but wth, our game only lasted for like what,
15-20 min ?!? darn short can. the guys had to use the field for their friendly matches. wth, came down all the way from work to play touch, and what did we get out of it? 15 min of game? pathetic.
was freaking pissed. dinner was damn dumb. i also have dinner at home. but i sacrificed my dinner because its so hard for us to have a get together. its like one in a million years that we get to meet. and to think i wasn't pro-dinner, i wanted to head home to have dinner and watch my tv show... in the end, i'm the one eating. thanks kai yin n kaixin. that long chat was sweet pleasure. we should meet up for more dinners ((:
friday was quite a "shock day" for me. My HR director called me into her office. she said "actually, we don't really need you anymore, since i've taken over your job and we don't have anything for you to do anymore, do you mind if today is your last day? or do you need more time?" no early notice by the way. it was just so darn abrupt. what could i say at that point. "yes i need more time?" haha,so of course i said ok, its fine with me. anyway i got this job through a recruit agency, don't want to be bonded by any contract anymore. my HR director gave $200 to 3 colleagues and i. my farewell lunch at a seafood restaurant near by. so w/o her, the four of us drove out to have a sumptuous lunch. totally not worth it, 160+ bucks. their portions were miserable, though we were pretty filled up. there was ,mango fried in batter + cold prawns in mayo, shark's fin, braised mushrooms with broccoli, ee-fu noodles, steamed fresh prawns, steamed fish in asam gravy, mango pudding + fruits. i'm so gonna miss everyone at the main office ): uncle alex, leo, darrell, nancy, carol, mui lin, joanne...
met kaiyin on saturday afternoon for a short retail therapy session. we didn't get anything though (a miracle) there's nothing nice in town now.i shall head to stupid places like chinatown and little india soon. haha. it was home sweet home, so tired i was on the verge of fainting. 55 cents bus fare ((: cheapo.
yesterday. church! dinner with parents, sis, aunty janet, aunty angie & uncle philip annabell & amos. met gwen at chinatown. yes, chinatown! haha,cause we were going to have dinner at Great eastern's Han's near chinatown. shopped around places we've never been, made some really great discoveries. their stuff there are cheap cheap. but i didn't get anything though. then met up with the rest of the jie meis to celebrate cher's b'dae ((: we were freaking noisy, bet everyone thought we were retards. walked around the night bizarre later on. lonely ride home on bus no. 61 while everyone took train. once again, happy birthday cheryl dear. prata and your house soon?
anyway,i'm still working at tuas, in the same company, but in a different department now, under QC (quality control) doing admin work. since they didn't need me in the HR dept, they transferred me to QC. the company area is really big cause it consist of many construction sites and offices. now, i'm on the other side of the company, far far away from the main office and CANTEEN (10-15 min walk). my office is beside a construction site now. once i leave the office to go to the loo, all i see are banglahs and foreign workers. Omg. someone please present me with an award for being so flexible and adaptable to my new dusty and dirty environment.i can't be a princess anymore. i've to ditched my heels for pumps or boots now. the most retarded thing is that, i have to wear the safety gear : safety helmet,safety boots, safety goggles when i'm out of the office. its actually quite fun. the people there are really friendly and ubber nice. no scoldings ((: and pay rise! and no more contract with recruit express. the only turn off; all that banglah starring can be lethal. i should just pluck out their eye balls. they stare at ANY gal that comes along. and i got to work 1/2 day on saturday. i really hope i can put up with such conditions. its something really different for me. no more skirts and heels. damn, bimbotic-ness.
gtg sleep. tata. wish me more luck tomorrow. God bless me. oh, dump the luck. God bless i mean.
was i too insensitive?i didn't even know what was going on in your life. i'm sorry. sadly, i didn't expect concern to turn into hurt. it made me hate myself so much. i'm just so scared it will happen to my friends around me. not you please. i really don't know what's going on. maybe i was a little too harsh on my words. but its too much for me to take. i can't accept it. never did i expect concern to turn into hurt. makes me feel like not caring bout anyone anymore. paranoia. it made me cry too. you take care. i shall leave you alone for the moment and not ask anymore. maybe i'm not someone you can confide in after all. i shall just keep quiet next time.
